I am not a beauty blogger. I’m not a beauty expert of any kind, nor am I even a beauty. I’m a short, “heavy set” woman about to turn 59 in a few days. And I have had something on my chest for DECADES that I must get off my chest as I enter the last year of my 50s. And here it is: it is time for beauty experts, bloggers, makeup artists and all other types whose job it may be to tell people how to look better, and feel better about how they look: GET OVER IT!!! There is no “one size fits all” beauty tip, regimen, product that is going to work for everyone and make every woman feel better about herself. The fact that all of you believe that there is one certain regimen for every woman everywhere makes those of us that your rules do not fit feel inferior and decidedly un-beautiful.
From the time I went through puberty, at the tender age of 10, I have had oily skin. During the acne-fied years it was loathsome, humiliating and horrible. The break outs, the runny make up, my mom getting me Cover Girl medicated makeup because the thought it would help with the break outs, etc. But into my late fifties, I have very few wrinkles because my skin moisturizes itself. However, I have never seen an article written by anyone about makeup and skin care that doesn’t include the phrase, “Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize.” Everyone says it, gay, straight, black, white, male, female, EVERYONE. The thing is that, while not having wrinkles at my age, oiliness and gravity have led to large pores. Large pores that have been pulled downward by the act of gravity on my face, and look even bigger now. I read a skin care article the other day called “Ten Items You Can Throw Away Forever.” It included makeup primer, which I use daily, a pore refining primer, because makeup alone does not do that magic trick. So…that one doesn’t apply to everyone, now does it? That article also had the phrase (once again!!!) “Moisturize, moisturize, moisturize!!!!!!!!” My skin needs minimal moisture added to it. I want my pores to shrink. Well, and my lips to stop looking smaller and smaller, my neck to stop wiggling and my my body to stop melting downward like the Nazi in the first Indiana Jones movie. Will moisturizing x 3 take care of that? Don’t think so!
I think the key here is to stop pretending that all women are the same. We are not. Not every middle aged woman should wear short hair. Not every woman needs moisture x 3, not every woman needs certain types of brow grooming supplies, or the same color blush, OR ANYTHING!!! Medicine has finally caught on to the fact that nothing is true for everyone. Why can’t so-called beauty experts? The women of the baby boom generation grew up at a very good time for skin care. Just as we entered our thirties, alpha hydroxy came out, so most of us do not look as we thought we would at our age. We’re beautiful, as is. We need to feel that in every fiber of our being, and so-called experts really don’t help. We have reached a point where we should know ourselves well enough to blow off this advice, and know what works for us. Including me. But that little three word phrase haunts me.